Marriage Jokes
A conversation between an husband and wife in their bedroom getting ready to have sex.HUSBAND: Dear, you should have this hair shaved a bit.WIFE: [Rolls her eyes] Yea! heard that...
A man brought a new computer home and asked his wife to set it up. The following day, when he got back from work he really needed to use the computer so he quickly put it on and...
A newly wed couple moves into their house. One day the husband comes home from work and his wife says!WIFE: Honey, you know in the upstairs bathroom one of the pipes is leaking,...
After 24 years of marriage, a wife accuses her husbandWIFE: Ever since we got married he has never uttered the words "I love you". JUDGE: Is this true?HUSBAND: Yes! Ever since I...
Women talk too much. That's why men have developed a superpower called SELECTIVE HEARING.EXAMPLE:When a woman says: "This house is a mess, HoneyYou and I need to clean this,Your...
A man takes his seat at a world cup final. He looks to his left and notices that there is a spare seat between himself and the next guy.MAN: Who would ever miss the world cup...
A man married very pretty girl and after the wedding, laid down the following rules: "I'll be home when I want, if I want, and at what time I want - and I don't expect any hassle...
WOMEN: A wife was not at home for the whole night. The next morning, she tells her husband that she stayed in her girlfriend's apartment. The husband calls 10 of her best friends...
A woman was at home when she heard someone knock at the door. She went and opened the door and saw a man standing there.He asked the lady, "Do you have a vagina?"She slammed the...
HUSBAND: Honey, whenever you are down, just go straight to the mirror and say "wow! I'm so cute and you will be relieved."WIFE: Thanks sweetie, you know what's good for me.HUSBAND...