Marriage Jokes

When I got married, I made the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans. Some months later, on my birthday, my car broke down on the way home from work. Since I lived in the...

A woman tells her friend she is getting married for the fourth time."How wonderful! I hope you don't mind me asking, what happened to your first husband?""He ate poisonous...

A wife was sleeping in the middle of the night, she suddenly shouted, "Get up quickly my husband is here!!!"The man got up from the bed, jumps up out through the window, hurts...

A married lady was going into a hotel with her boyfriend when she saw her husband coming out of that same hotel with his girlfriend. On sighting the husband, the lady immediately...

WIFE: How many girlfriends did you have before we got married?Husband remains silent...Five mintues later.WIFE: Why are you silent?HUSBAND: Don't disturb while I'm counting!

A man walks into a bar and asks for a beer. After drinking it, he looks in his shirt pocket and asks for another beer. After drinking that one, he looks in his shirt pocket again...

The mother-in-law, comes home and finds her son-in-law furious and packing his suitcase."What happened?" "What happened? I'll tell you what happened! I sent an email to my wife,...

WIFE: Our new neighbour always kisses his wife when he goes to work, why don't you do that?HUSBAND: How can I? I don't even know her.

A bride tells her husband, "Honey, you know I'm a virgin and I don't know anything about sex. Can you explain it to me first?"The husband replied, "Okay, sweetheart. Putting it...

MAGICIAN: I'll cut your wife's body into two halves. AKPOS: What kind of magic is that, you'll turn my problem from one to two! Make her disappear instead

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