Marriage Jokes
A man asks wife "what would you do if I won a lottery?" Wife says "I would take half and leave you." "Perfect. I have won Rs.100, here's Rs.50. Now get lost!"
A man and his wife shower together. The husband puts his hand on her breast and says "These are nice but if they were a bit firmer, you could walk around without a bra for me."...
Susan is fed up with her husband watching football on TV all the time."Im leaving you!" she yells. "All you care about is football. In any case, Ive found someone else. Hes much...
Husband comes home drunk and breaks some plates, vomits and falls down on the floor! Wife pulls him up and cleans everything.Next day when he gets up he expects her to be really...
Never argue with a woman, just use your brains like this guy. A man went on a night out with his friends the wife is furious and tells the kids that when he comes back they must...
Wife hit her husband with frying pan. HUSBAND: What was that for? WIFE: I found a paper in your pocket with the name Jenny on it. HUSBAND: I took part in a race last week and...
A lady came to see her doctor and the following conversation ensued: LADY: Doctor please call in my husband. DOCTOR: Trust me, I am a gentleman.LADY: No doc, your nurse is sitting...
One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."I said...
A married couple was in a terrible accident where the woman's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from her body because she was...
After 15 years of marriage a wife asked her husband to describe her.He looked at her slowly and then said : "A-B-C-D-E-F-G- H-I-J-K"."What does that mean?" she asked."Adorable,...